At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
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