yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize