I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize