I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize