I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Randomize