No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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