And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize