4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
