so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
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