Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Randomize