last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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