Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
