she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize