Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
