i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize