Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
