Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
