You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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