Will you blow on my dice?
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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