i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
my poor anus
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
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