Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
