Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I want you more than these girls want KFC
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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