Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
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