come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
barbara walters just said penis...
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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