Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
