The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
