piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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