I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Just pee around me
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
