I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
