he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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