He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
