Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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