Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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