that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
