Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
