It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
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For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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