The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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