everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
