actually, I'm a sock model
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I just want nice things and good sex
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize