I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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