Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
this hospital has no fireball
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
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