i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
high people should be assigned attendants
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
