My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize