I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it