Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
