nut hugger
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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