i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize