I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
