But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
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