Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Alive.
So much puke
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
